Santa Cruz Pirate Fest 2009

Blow the Man Down: Marooned in Paradise

After our celebration in the year 2008 we again took to the seas in search of fortune and infamy. Not far did we sail before we sighted an armada of warships sent by King George II to take us down to Davey Jone’s locker. In our heroic battle with the armada we set three of their ships ablaze, but from the holds of the Black Shenanigan burst a score of ninjas. We defeated the cowardly assassins but were forced to give up the battle and flee around the horn due to the damage to our rigging.

Having escaped the armada, we’re now stranded on the shores of the Gal


Recent fashion trends I am not too keen on

I’m not saying nobody should do these things, everyone has a right to be their own person and wear what they like. Heck, I run around in full pirate regalia. Certainly a large portion of the population thinks I’m a complete idiot for that. I understand. I am just listing things here that I personally do not find attractive. Without further ado, let the slaughter begin.

Girl pompadour. I am a big fan of Hayden Panettiere, but not a fan of this hairstyle. I can’t put my finger on why … it just looks dumb.

Fauxhawk. I used to do this in the bath back when I was 6.

Stretched ear piercings. I have to think that this particular practice is done more for an introspective purpose than it is for attractiveness, because attractive it is not. One thing it has going for it is, it shows commitment unlike our friend the fauxhawk.

Pre-worn jeans. You pay more to buy a pair of jeans that look old and used. The problem is, those symmetrical bleached shapes and the sanded off patches look totally fake. You can tell the difference between them and actual old jeans so all you pull off is looking like a poser.

Giant glasses. We all know who started this little trend. Who in their right mind wants to look like that stupid spoiled whore anyway? Does anyone stop and think that maybe if they emulate a slutty, useless, annoying bitch that you might be perceived as one yourself?

The empire waist. I am told it is pronounced “ahm-peer” to make it sound more fancy-shmancy. This dress style speaks to me though. It says, “I am ready to gestate.” So maybe the next big fashion will be bras replaced by breast pumps, we’ll have to see.

Guys wearing girl pants. Woo, look at me, I’m a hipster and I can’t sit down without going sterile!

And last but most certainly not least, the purse dog. What more responsible decision can one make then to purchase a small dog who’s sole purpose will be to decorate your purse. These little mutant dogs actually trigger my gag reflex on occasion. Shouldn’t this be considered animal cruelty?

And that concludes my list of recent fashion trends I’m not so keen on. If you are offended by this, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean you, I mean all those other people who do that. Honest.



I have more to say

My last post was too short…

You see, the last 8 years of our government have at its core endeavored to control all of us with fear, treat us like idiots and steal from us. Our president didn’t even feel the need to answer our questions and only talked to us if he felt like he absolutely had to. Our civil liberties were eroded in the name of homeland security and yet we were less secure within our borders than ever before. Natural disasters went practically unnoticed while we sent our National Guard to foreign shores to fight a war backed by lies. We as a people were held in contempt, looked down on, ignored and in this age of mass communication nobody in the world was blind to it.

I talked to someone who is British. We were talking about the election and I asked, “Why do you care about our election? We don’t follow the elections of other countries with this much interest but it seems the whole world is on the edge of their seats about ours.” He answered, “Because weather we like it or not, the United States is the military and economic leader of the world, and what you do


A new era

I came into NextSpace today to see everyone gathered around the projector in the cafe area eating breakfast food and watching the inauguration. Everyone cheered when Biden took the oath, yelling, “Finally, Chaney is gone!” I was moved by the musical piece that was played. Obama took his oath and everyone cheered again, loudly. The feeling I had is, “Finally, I have a country that I can potentially be proud of again.” Obama’s speech was inspiring. I want all of those things to happen. I want the greed, waste and arrogance to stop. I want us to take responsibility, put our noses to the grindstone and become the leading example for the world once again.

In other news, on Saturday we had game day at Kevin’s house. That was a lot of fun and his wife and him are very good hosts. It is always a pleasure to visit. We played a game called Mutiny that was pretty fun though I see some obvious holes in the strategy of the game. It would take some more trials to see exactly how much they could be exploited.

I also tried out the BBQ last night. I cooked some ahi tuna steaks, melted edam cheese on top, onto a cheese roll with olive oil and balsamic vinegar and some tarragon. I also grilled some nice mushrooms (I forget what they are called) and had some raspberries and blueberries. It was my first home cooked meal on board and it verified that I have all of the tools and such that I need for doing a barbecue.

Also, I made level 80 in WoW. That’s pretty exciting. Now I can start doing some real raids again.



A pirate’s life for me

On Sunday Randall and Vince and I went sailing. They brought a gallon of grog as tribute and a phatty sammich for us to gnosh on. We played a game of Ivanhoe and then cast off for the high seas. The launch was the worst yet; I had a clever idea about how backing up worked but it did not pan out like I had expected and we ended up going backwards the wrong way out of the slip. With some careful maneuvering and some help with a long pole we turned her around and were underway. The tabernacle went smoothly and we cleared the bridge. A quick call to the harbormaster and we got to show our colors and our calls to Aldo’s and the Crow’s Nest. Cheers came back tenfold and I now know that the true age of piracy has begun.

Out of the harbor there was not enough wind to properly move so we motored out to about 2 miles. Raising the sails on the way, going over some terms and orders, we finally cut the engines. Nothing is quite like the transition from the glug-glug of a diesel engine to the sound of wind whipping over your sails. Nothing. It is a banishing of crude mechanics from your mind to be replaced by pure, natural beauty. Here are some pictures of us being pirates:

We took ‘Rock N Roll’ out further than I ever have before, I think we went about 3.5 miles out. Along the way, past the mile marker Randall noticed shapes below the water, which was clearer than I thought possible. We saw jellyfish for the most part. Here is a couple pictures I caught with my new digital camera:

We tried to make it up far enough north to ogle the nude beach with the spyglass but the wind was not in our favor for northward progress. We turned south for a little wing-on-wing and got pretty close to the surfers at the point. Back down again to the harbor and we sailed all the way into the mouth before we cut to the engine.

It all is really getting easier each time and every trip is a chance to learn. I also must say, I am enjoying this very much. Please everyone, don’t hesitate to show your interest and let me know when you are available.

I had thought we were meeting up with Justin and Jenn but it seems that was a slight miscalculation of dates and they are coming next Sunday. Well, that’s no problem for me! We’ll just meet next weekend for some sailing. I have some spots free, who wants to go sailing?


NOTE: I did not really take those pictures of the jellyfish. It seems some people were confused so I just wanted to clarify that.


Self similarities

Let’s start this post by stating quite clearly that I am no physicist, I am probably not saying anything that has not been thought of before and I do not claim any of this as science. Let us call this philosophical poetry about the existence of everything.

There are things in our world that are easily observable programs that appear in nature. Things like the Golden Ratio matching a snail shell’s spiral. Here is an example that I found of black coral growths matching the patterns in an acacia tree and a fern that follows an obvious repeating pattern of scale:

These things can be reproduced with computer programs like fractals. Some might even say that it can explain the formation of life itself and suggests that life throughout the universe might not be as rare as we think. This lead me to think about another set of self similarities. From the tiny quark through the living cell, solar system and up to the universe these spherical structures seem to repeat in increments of scale. Below in an illustration to demonstrate that point:

Trust me, the turtle belongs there. My romantic theory about the existence of everything is that this scale of self similarities extends infinitely in both directions of scale, big and small. This means there are particles that make up a quark and particles that make up those things and so on, and that the universe is itself a particle of something bigger. I have no evidence to back this up other than the precedence set by the similarities that we can observe. I also challenge that we as humans like to thing of things in terms of a beginning and end and that everything has those two things. Consider the possibility that there was no beginning of time, there will be no end of time and everything that our universe is composed of has always been there in one form or another and always will be. It may, just as an atom, be sundered apart and shared by other things in a different incarnation but infinite entirety of everything will always be and always has been and this truth exists on every level of scale.

Or maybe I am just trying to make your brains hurt.



The New Age of Piracy

Now that I am fully qualified to be sailing this little floating world I own, the ground rule I had mentioned earlier are to be put to action immediately. This may not all be in vain as the career choice in coming back into fashion. Please read an article that advocates modern piracy HERE.

The first rule on my boat is, if we go sailing you must be in full pirate regalia. Do not let this discourage you, for dressing like a pirate can be fun, easy and cheap!

A sash of cloth around the waist and a bandanna for the bare essentials, just find some old cloth. Maybe a simple t-shirt with a short split down the chest, or a button down shirt. Cut or shred some old pants at the knees for some slops. Some striped or knee-high socks are a great touch if you have any; A great pair of socks can make any shoes look good or just go barefoot like they used to in the old days. Rather than bringing a plastic sword, I suggest a cut up broom handle. Pirates often fought with a simple belaying pin which was a wooden dowel used to tie up a line.

The second rule aboard my boat is, bring a tribute of rum. It doesn’t really need to be rum but nothing makes me happier to give the time and effort to take my friends on a sailing trip than a nice beverage to relax with later.

The third rule aboard my boat is, you are my crew, I am your skipper. You do what I say when I say it. This is for safety and smooth sailing but I try to be fair and calm. If you have a question or a problem, let me know when we are not in the middle of doing something complicated but by all means, ask away!

The fourth rule aboard my boat is, go take a serious bathroom break before we leave. You can use the head on board for potty but I am trying to avoid using it for poopy.

Those are my current rules, let the sailing begin!

EDIT: I was reminded of rule #5 which I considered an unwritten rule but it is worth mentioning. If you have boobies and are willing to let me touch them, rules 1-4 need not apply.